Humor at the Expense of my Alma Mater

If you don't follow college foosball, then you might not know that the University of Alabama is supposed to be going to the Weedeater Bowl in Shreveport, or something like that. Not that we deserved going to anything better than the Tidy Bowl, mind you. Nonetheless, someone with a good sense of humor and too much money on his hands erected a billboard that says, "Rolled," and has the score of the Alabama-Lousiana Monroe game. This billboard is right next to the stadium where doubtless it will be seen by many a Bama fan. I hope it fires up the team to win this one.

However, the billboard may be all for nought! There is the strong possibility that Alabama will not be able to get to the bowl game in Shreveport. Yes, apparently the Tide's busses can't get past Monroe either.

Ave Ursa. Roll damned Tide.

Zouave!

Pictures from the 2007 Plantation Liendo Civil War Living History Event. They feature a damned handsome zouave, if I say so myself.

Nineteenth century warfare: it's my genre.

Roll Damn Tide

All I've got to say about the Arkansas game: whew.

Interesting statistic: Tuscaloosa's population as of 2006 is a little over 83,000 people, making it the 5th largest city in Alabama. Bryant-Denny Stadium holds 92,000 people, making Tuscaloosa, on game-day, the fourth largest city in Alabama.

Roll Tide.

What kind of bees give milk?

Boo-bies!

Okay, really. This is supposed to be a news story? I clicked on it not because I'm not above a second glance at a good set of life-sustaining mammary glands; rather, I clicked on "Exercise unleashes a bounce bras can't handle" because I figured that this had to be some kind of stealth ad for jog-bras.

No, it's real. Someone in England apparently found it absolutely stunning that during exercise, every woman's mammalian protuberances will--get this--bounce. They even went so far as to hook up biometric devices to measure the amount and pattern.

And just in case you fear to click the above link for fear of juggling jubblies on your work screen, allow me to quote the caption, "Study scientist Joanna Scurr records measurements as a participant runs on a treadmill. Eight sensors on her body revealed her breasts moved in a figure-8 pattern." (Credit: University of Portsmouth. Emphasis mine.)

MSNBC, you suck.

Dear Anonymous,

Please tell Miss MD that I wish her the best. This truly is a very small world. Oddly enough, if you talk to a law librarian named Anne at your distinguished university, she and her husband are dear friends of mine.

I hope I have been sufficiently vague.
-A. Bosch

Belated Book Review

I picked this up at a friend named Lance's suggestion, looking for something new now that I've read almost everything Dashiell Hammett has written. Yes, I realize this has been out since 2001, but I read "Neverwhere" a while back, and I was really disappointed.

Not so with this one.

Damn, this one's good. Not sure if I'm going to sit through "Anansi Boys," but this one has really got me going through the old college library. In fact, I think I'm going to go pick up a copy of "Hero with a Thousand Faces" post haste. This book had me pulling out Hamilton's "Mythology" and the encyclopedic set of "Man, Myth, and Magic," and I'm not entirely sure I kept up with all of the references.

Let me put it this way: I've been making obscure references to Norse mythos for the last three days now. In fact, I really geeked out when a young girl on exchange from Germany named Freya enrolled in one of my classes. Sure, it's not as cool as the year I had an Ulisses, a Nestor, and a Molly all in one class, but how often does one have the fairest of the Vanir attending one's every word?

Anyway, I'm moving on to the new William Gibson novel. Here's hoping it's not another "Pattern Recognition."

One-Liners Overheard While Hunting

• You can't drink all day unless you start in the morning.
  
• Boy, he was madder than a captured Jap. (Dont' remember the context, just thought it was a really funny phrase.)
  
• How do you put the magazine restrictor in this thing? (Uttered to a game warden while holding an over-and-under shotgun.)
• If the birds were always there and easy to hit, it wouldn't be hunting; it would be shopping.
• Wait--is the limit 12 or 15? (Asked by a fellow with 19 doves.)
• If you buy your girlfriend a license and bring her with you, your limit is 24.
• This is my wife. She's a retriever AND a bird cleaner, all in one.
• When a little girl shows up with her daddy, and she's got a .410 of her own that she's actually using to shoot birds, she's going to limit out before anyone else in the field.
• I've got three boxes of shells. If I can't get 12 birds in 75 shots, I've got other problems than low ammunition.
• It's not beer. It's aiming fluid.
• If you miss the first two shots, the third shot is just anger.